Hard yards

I don't pretend to have a hard life by any means - I've got to be one of the luckiest people around! I continually remark at how fortunate I am to have great health, air to breath, water to drink, food to eat and people to talk to. I think we take for granted the freedoms that we have as human beings. No animal has the freedom to have a day off, or just do something for the fun of it - life is nothing but work for animals. Take this a step further, how many of us have the freedom to choose how we spend our time? Sure, most Australians have this luxury to a degree, but I would challenge that most people in third world countries do not. I'm sure hunger keeps them awake at night. If we skip a meal our hunger is somewhat debilitating... can you imagine this compounded by never really getting a proper meal, yet working harder and longer days with poor health - I shudder to think.

This is what I do - I discredit my problems by holding them relative to others and suddenly they don't seem so bad. But they still are important to me. By writing this blog I get to see my thoughts in black and white which seems makes them clearer. And typically I'll have a rant and be better afterwards.

Without the big picture in front of you, it's easy to get lost in the short term difficulties we face striving to build dreams.  We get tired. Cassie has 11 weeks of class time remaining, 5-7 weeks of work placement and then her final exhibition. She's worked hard her whole life, in addition to these two and a half years of additional study. We work hard and sometimes don't see the benefits.

I get tired. Trying to build a business but spend more of my time swimming in pointless politics than actually contributing to the bottom line. Naturally I'm remaining restrained in my outburst as we rely on a particularly petty client to keep us on track - without them we'll be taking a step backwards. I find myself continually tiptoeing around their ridiculously over sensitive ego's... trying to keep everyone happy.
What happened to the days of everyone being happy with your work? Why is it such a fight these days?
I resent being beholden to anyone - the only way out is up - we will need to secure more clients so we are not seemingly reliant on flippant decision makers. The truth of the matter is we don't rely on this client, but without them it'll be uncomfortable and jeopardise the trip.

I don't see this adventure as the chance to 'get away from it all'. I'm not the kind of person who runs away from problems. I want to have this adventure AND be able to relax to the idea that I will have a business and a job when I return. I want to simplify my life and give perspective to the ups and downs that life brings. After all, what has it all been for if I can't have this.
I have been in business for 7 years and had one month off. I think I deserve a break.